calm mind

“A calm mind is your ultimate weapon against your challenges.”

I’m sure you’ll agree with the quote above. But the truth is, having a calm mind is easier said than done, especially when our mind is in constant planning. We have so many plans, like work plans, life plans, marriage plans, and the list goes on. This constant planning can create high levels of stress. Stress can affect our way of communication.

How? Think of this.

Every time we are stressed, minor irritants can be a cause of frustration. Stress can make a calm person aggressive! So it is important to know how to control stress and frustration, even in dire situations.

Here is how to stay calm and collected in any situation.


1. Have the courage to step back


Stressful situations can become quite emotional. But you can control the burst out of emotions if you let yourself have some time out. 


2. Gather your thoughts before responding


If you’re communicating via email, it’s easy to hit send before calming down from an angry state. Use technology to make your life easier. Use it as an assisting tool, not a cause of stress. Ex. when you receive a stressful email, do not reply immediately!


3. Change perspective


Try understanding the situation of the person you’re having difficulty with. Put yourself in their shoes. See, hear and feel the situation through their eyes, ears, and emotions.


4. Analyse your options


Depending upon your situation, here are some questions to consider:

– What is the most appropriate response to the present situation?

– What do you know about the other person’s communication style?

– Do you have enough information to make an informed decision?

– Have you tried hearing what the other person has to say? Without becoming defensive or shifting into win-lose thinking?


5. Logic instead of emotion


View the facts and detach them from the emotional element of the situation. To do this, look after yourself. When a difficult situation arises, it will less likely to affect you.

Some strategies include:

Deep Breathing. This helps to relax the muscles and allows oxygen to flow to the brain so that you can think more rationally.

Regular exercise. This could be as simple as a walk that can clear the head while applying nervous energy productively.

Become an Observer. Hold back from the situation and reality, as if you were a detached observer. Step back and see the bigger picture.


6. Master actions versus reactions


You can control how you feel and react to any situation. What you cannot control is how others feel or react. So you must do what you can within, always know your circle of influence.

Recognize and check your reactions, intentions, and assumptions to control your actions.